ARE YOU (ASPIRING TO BE) A DARING FEMININE LEADER?
Learning, embracing, and more masterfully implementing the touchstone qualities of Feminine Leadership*
- Empathy/Compassion: Being sensitive to the thoughts and feelings of others; extending love, acceptance and forgiveness
- Vulnerability: Owning up to your limitations and asking for help
- Authenticity: Being your true self and not conforming to fit in
- Humility: Seeking to serve others and to share credit
- Trust-building: Encouraging, fostering and modeling psychological safety, respect and dependability ("I've got your back")
- Inclusiveness: Soliciting, listening to, respecting and considering many voices, especially those different from your own
- Generosity: Being liberal with time, resources, advice, and support
- Balance: Giving life, as well as work, harmonious time and energy; maintaining healthy boundaries with giving and receiving
- Patience: Taking a long-term view and letting things unfold vs. forcing them
- Collaboration: Working together to create or achieve a common goal
- Loyalty: Providing support and allegiance to each other; genuinely having the others' best interests at heart and ensuring
relationships are reciprocal
WHAT CHALLENGES DO DARING FEMININE LEADERS FACE?
- Feeling old, burned out, unenthusiastic about work, low in physical and mental energy,
overwhelmed, unseen or unappreciated - Their self-care practices are inconsistent or non-existent
- Their vision(s) for their life and their organization feels urgent but unfulfilled
- Have fear of becoming obsolete in the workplace
- Feel incongruent with true self at work – masculine vs. feminine, their spiritual nature
- Have poor balance between work and personal life (too much work and not enough “play”)
- Have fear of wasting their best years too wrapped up in work to be living out personal goals
- Their changing hormones and/or stress habits are creating an emotional, physical roller coaster
and excess weight or a constant struggle to keep weight consistent
- They feel isolated and not sure who to talk to about their fears and self-doubt, work challenges,
and personal struggles without being judged, dismissed or having confidentiality broken - Not earning what they want/same as male counterparts, but not sure what to do to change that
COMMON WANTS/DESIRES OF DARING FEMININE LEADERS
- To feel more consistently confident about their abilities and their decision-making, especially in
their leader role - To respected by the males in their organization—especially those at or above their level
- To lead with their feminine side and spiritual principles at play
- To feel enthusiastic and joyful about work again
- Have a deep desire and drive for making a big impact on their organizations and even in the
world as a whole - To create a team culture of respect, growth and enjoyment that positively impacts the
individuals as well as the organization - To be advancing in their leadership role in their organization or a new one where they feel
valued and have the agency to make a big impact - To feel and be healthier, have more energy and peace of mind
- To have more love and passion in their lives
- To have deeper, richer, more vulnerable and mutually respectful relationships
- To truly love and appreciate themselves and have more loving and kind thoughts towards
themselves than unkind and unloving thoughts - To be making more money while working fewer hours, or having more chunks of off time
(like 2-3 weeks at a time away from work and unplugged a few times a year) - To have more dedicated hours of down time than they currently allocate to relax and recover, have
fun, spend time with friends and family, enjoy hobbies and favorite activities, and do volunteer work
that makes a difference for others - To be able to feel truly “in the moment” and present with their personal time and not drawn into
work mentally or even physically (like responding to a work call/text/email) - To have the time, energy, tools and confidence to improve a current relationship or build a new one
WHAT IS DARING FEMININE LEADERSHIP?
Leading Your Self (FIRST) – Developing emotional self-regulation. Setting and maintaining healthy boundaries. Engaging in regular self-care practices that keep mind and body healthy and at optimal functioning. Leading by example. Knowing/ acknowledging and improving your weaknesses. Owning your strengths and unique gifts. Giving from your overflow, not your cup.
Leading Your Teams/Others – Modeling the attributes of self-leadership. Modeling daring leadership (the courage of being vulnerable as a strength. Questioning and changing the status quo vs. following it. Calling out inequity, bullying and toxicity. Creating nurturing, supportive systems and modeling feminine leadership qualities.* Giving praise and acknowledgement vs. seeking praise and approval. Building trust and collaboration vs. secrecy and competition. Coaching others to become their best selves and reach their true potential.
Leading Your Vision – Envisioning and building a thriving organization with a strong, supportive and diverse culture. Finding ways to make a contribution personally, through your teams and with your organization to positively impact your community and beyond. Claiming more than just equal participation in outdated and harmful systems—rather, transforming those systems to make them more just, more compassionate, more diverse, more innovative, and more sustainable. Leaving a legacy of impact you’re proud of.
Connect with Other DFL's, Share Your Voice, Create Collaboration,
Ask for Support, Learn to Better Lead Self/Others/Visions
WHO ARE DARING FEMININE LEADERS?
* Females (gender-identified)
* Generally over 50
* Leaders of/in small to mid-sized organizations (500-5,000 employees or volunteers) OR
* Founders of their organization (non-profit or for-profit) or have worked their way up thru the ranks
and hold an executive level of leadership
* Spiritually awakening or awakened and/or with a high degree of Emotional Intelligence
* Feel passionate about having a highly positive impact in their organizations and communities
* College-educated, often with advanced degrees
THE COACHING CENTER FOR MINDTRAINING AND SUCCESS
COACHING, SPEAKING, TRAINING
COMMON INNER STRUGGLES OF DARING FEMININE LEADERS
- Self-doubt -- about their abilities as a leader, ability to handle big challenges; may feel “lucky” about
how they have handled past challenges in their leadership journey
- They often have a hard time making hard decisions or making them quickly, for fear of making a
mistake or being criticized, which has led to missed opportunities for themselves or their company
or conflict in their teams
- Fear about failing, looking bad, being judged/criticized/ridiculed—especially by male colleagues
- Fear of being seen as weak if they aren’t “aggressive like a man” at work or as a bitch if they show
assertion, so there’s a constant struggle of how to be in their authentic power
- Feel Pressure to “fit in” to the male leadership model even though it doesn’t feel authentic to them
and how they really want to lead, or have fallen in line with that model for so long that they’ve lost
touch with the ability to lead with their more natural, feminine side
- They fear conflict and try to avoid it at all costs, or feel ill-equipped to resolve conflict in their teams.
Often, they just feel like a “referee” trying to mediate and smooth things over
- They often take on others’ tasks to either “make sure it’s done right” or to avoid having critical
conversations with people who are not meeting their job expectations
- Have a hard time setting and maintaining healthy boundaries in their leader role, in their various
roles in their personal life, and/or between their work hours and personal time
- They are often hijacked by their Pleaser Saboteur so they sacrifice their needs, feelings, time and
goals in order to meet others’ expectations or “not rock the boat” and have others disappointed in
them or criticize them
- They also tend to have a strong HyperAchiever Saboteur, which has contributed to their success,
but also their insecurities and lack of healthy work-life balance
- Constantly feel pulled in multiple directions and conflicting priorities, which ends up causing friction
in work or personal relationships and a sense of high stress and burn-out
- Their tendency to over-give to please others or prove their worth also leads to burn-out and often
resentment
- They usually have issues with getting good sleep and feeling rested and energized for their day
- They have one or more unhealthy coping mechanisms, such as alcohol, cigarettes, food, shopping,
even sex, which has affected their health, their weight, and/or their self-esteem